I could see the car approaching in my rear view mirror.
I stopped behind the pick-up truck in front of me as we waited for the light on
Glenmore Trail. It was around 5 in the afternoon and a beautiful warm fall day. As I looked around at the traffic my eye caught the rear view mirror and a car
approaching , coming up behind me at traffic speed, not looking like it would stop.
The car hit me at 80 km with no braking marks to indicate even an attempt to stop. I was buckled in as my car took the impact. The car behind me looked crushed. I got out of the car to see if the driver behind me was ok. I called 911, as did several others who had witnessed the crash.
What would be going on in your head as you approach a driver who has slammed into your vehicle?
Anger that they were in attentive- looking at the phone and texting as they
drove?
Anxious and concerned as you saw a slumped over driver, clearly in medical
distress, having a stroke in their car like my brother did? Or perhaps a heart
attack?
An incident happens and we react. Somewhere there is a choice involved. The fight, flight, freeze reaction of the amygdala happens…. And how do we switch to anger, concern, fear, any number of different reactions?
Frame is how we seek to understand an event. Our language describing the event, “ I stopped for the light and this car hit me full force from behind. They did not even brake, the police said there were no brake marks.” Our language for how we describe what we are aware of is often based on past experience. Negative self-talk, fearful, angry, anxious?
In a moment, seconds, time we react… yet if we can switch from react to concern as the driver in medical distress can we not choose in sudden events to respond instead of reacting? Can we choose compassion? Even if the driver was on their phone texting?
We often think of reactions are innate, inborn, just a part of being human. Indeed we can learn to respond instead of reacting. We can shift our thinking by reframing our thoughts, our self-talk language impact feeling response.
Martha McManus
From the book Getting to Yes, William Ury
During the 1979 SALT II arms talks with Soviet leadership, the US sent a very junior senator, Joe Biden, Jr., to Moscow to negotiate with the Soviet Foreign Minister, Andrei Gromyko.
As a response to Gromyko unequivocal NO to the US proposal, Biden did this:
“Instead of arguing with Gromyko and taking a counterposition, he slowly and gravely said, ‘Mr. Gromyko, you make a very persuasive case. I agree with much of what you’ve said. When I go back to my colleagues in the Senate, however, and report what you’ve just told me, some of them–like Senator Goldwater or Senator Helms–will not be persuaded, and I’m afraid their concerns will carry weight with others.’ Biden went on to explain their worries. ‘You have more experience in these arms-control matters than anyone else alive. How would you advise me to respond to my colleagues’ concerns?’
Gromyko could not resist the temptation to offer advice to the inexperienced young American. He started coaching him on what he should tell the skeptical senators. One by one, Biden raised the arguments that would need to be dealt with, and Gromyko grappled with each of them. In the end, appreciating perhaps for the first time how the amendment would help win wavering votes, Gromyko reversed himself and gave his consent.” (Id. at 61-62.)
In my neighbourhood there is a small galery of an artist. He is now in his late 60'. He used to have a big gallery, was moderately successful, sold paintings in oil and aquarelle. 10 years ago a fire destroyed all but all his work. He was traumatised but soon realised that he actually feels relieved. He understood that while not being a huge artist, actually what he was good at, colors, could be used with computer programs and he re-oriented interior design for companies. He feels much more successful now and enjoys the turn in his life and use of his talents. Though he still paints in oil and aquarelle, actually all his work targets interior design.
Simona Aradei Odenkirchen
Reframing a problem to unlock innovation
What is the sum of 5 plus 5?”
We are creating frames for what we see, hear, and experience all day long, and those frames both inform and limit the way we think.
What two numbers add up to 10?
Albert Einstein: “If I had an hour to solve a problem and my life depended on the solution, I would spend the first fifty-five minutes determining the proper question to ask, for once I know the proper question, I could solve the problem in less than five minutes.”
Kodak: “making cameras and film”
Kodak - lost
It lost because it was not able to open its frame early enough to see its business as including this new technology.
Netflix
Delivered DVD by post
Netflix - grew
Saw itself as in the movie-delivery business - moved into online.
Reframing problems is an important tool for:
physically or mentally changing their point of view
increasing the imagination because it unlocks a vast array of solutions.
seeing the world around us in a brand-new light.
seeing the world from others’ perspectives,
How: by asking questions that begin with “why.”
Reframing problems takes effort, attention, and practice.
My grandmother is 88 years old. Winter is tough for her. Stuck in her little room, it seems that every muscle and bone hurt more and she has a hard time dealing with illnesses. We worried this past winter that she is getting weaker and worse. But spring is here and off she is in the garden working the land and trimming the vines like a 20-year old! The sense of purpose is giving her a new frame in which she becomes active, motivated and full of life!
Elderly homes need reframing
On a side note, people in elderly homes lack a sense of purpose. The saddest sight in Germany is to see these care homes. While it is clear that the elders are very well taken care of, they seem sad and depressed. I believe that we need to rethink the way these homes function, so that we can reframe the lives of the people who live there. They need to be integrated in the community and if the elders wish to contribute to the community should be given the opportunity to do so. Former lawyers could give legal advice, teachers could teach and so on. People should not be alone, disconnected and without purpose.
The reform of prisons and the way inmates are treated as extreme reform (as they do it in Norway) or moderate (as in other European countries). The shift from a punishing institution to the prison as institution of re-socializing the inmates and helping them to go back to a normal life, prisons as part of the community etc.
Advantages: well-being of inmates and ex-inmates, well-being of guards, lower criminality, lower costs on long term for prison system and fast re-integration of the inmates in the society.
